The chilly fall morning nipped at any exposed skin. My friends and i clambered up a steep hill as our gear threatened to drag us down the dusty slope. Huffing and puffing, we made it to a stretch of relatively flat trail. Then we saw the final steep bit… We could have taken a picture of an apple and still gotten an A for this photo project.
At the top, the rising glow of the sun illuminated the early morning fog that was draped over the quiet town of Cupertino. Colors seemed muted and bland compared to the beauty of the sun peeking over the mountains. Here was a moment that would always be remembered, a step back from the rush and chaos of life. A moment of serenity.


The Straight Poop on Parenthood

Field Notes From Fatherhood

We have been told so many times that being a parent is the most important job we will ever have that most of us think it’s true. It is. There is no doubt that parents – particularly in the early years of development – have more to do with shaping a child’s future than any other influencing factor. We have taken this so much to heart, however, that an undercurrent of anxiety, something approaching low-level panic, seems to run through the lives of many parents today, a Stygian stream of self-doubt and second-guessing.

‘Attachment? Breastfeed ‘til the age of three??? Spock: Dr. Benjamin or Mr. Vulcan? Should we go organic? Fish is brain food. Fish is full of toxins. Why do I feel guilty about going back to work? To spank or not to spank? Loose and laidback or strict and upright? Oh God, do my kids like me?’


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A Psychological Lifeline for Asian American Teens

A Psychological Lifeline for Asian American Teens

A very insightful article that discloses the stress imposed on and felt by Asian American teens especially in the Fremont Union High School District and in my High School, Monta Vista.  I believe this article should be shared with as many asian american parents as possible so they can have an outside, third party view of their relationship with their kids, and find ways to improve on this.

The Year Without Pants: An interview with author Scott Berkun

Interesting sounding book about the workforce and the leadership that goes on. Anyone can be given a title “Manager” and be expected to lead… But do they REALLY KNOW how to lead? Can they connect with their workers and encourage and motivate them to work?

The Blog

Scott Berkun is the author of four previous books and a sought-after speaker. His work has appeared in The New York Times, The Washington Post, Forbes, The Wall Street Journal, The Economist, The Guardian, Wired magazine, National Public Radio, and The Huffington Post. From 2010 to 2012 Scott led Team Social at Automattic. The Year Without Pants: and the future of work recounts his experiences and reflections on leading a distributed team at Automattic. We recently got the chance to ask Scott a few questions about the book and his time at Automattic.

Give us a little insight into the title of the book, The Year Without Pants: and the future of work. What does being pantsless, or pants-free have to do with the future of work?
Scott Berkun: A recent Gallup Poll showed 71% of workers…

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Do You want to …

Do You want to be right, or happy?

I often hear of and see many couples or parents threatening relationships with an ultimatum: break up, cut off financial support, take away shelter, etc. I believe many people fail to see past their own selfish designs and want to win everything. Nothing is wrong with winning, but when it comes to relationships, there are some complications that arise. If one is arguing for the sake of changing the other to fit their needs instead of looking at both of their needs, then there is a problem. There must always be a compromise. It may not be a perfect compromise, one side may have more say than the other, but there must be some middle ground. 

The same goes for politics. However, in international relations there is an even greater danger.  Look at the Issue with Syria, this is a matter concerning military involvement, and the cost is human lives, resources, and relationships.  Politicians must walk the fine line of coming to a consensus while also trying to gain the advantage over their opposition.  

Why not apply this to our own relationships? However, without the violence and anger.  I understand there are times where no matter how hard you try you lose control over your emotions, but if you yourself are aware of this, and is disciplined, you can tell yourself to take a step back and look at the situation from a logical point of view.  What are your motives for this disagreement, what might the other party’s motives for this disagreement be? and how can we work it out.  

There are many times where I have witnessed, heard about, or experienced personally, a parent for example, seeking to gain control over their child by using the premises that they provide financial support.  Now that is true, in this case the parent is right, and the child should be thankful and respect their parent. But what about the cases where the child feels that he or she is treated unfairly? I believe that if ever there is a dispute, and one side is right, the winning side, in this case the parent, should at least make an effort to investigate why their child or the other party is did what they did. This would not only make the child happier, but also make the parent happier because the child will see that their parent is making an effort to understand and appeal to them.

There are cases where one does win and is also happy, and there are also cases where one party IS actually right, but in most cases there are conflicts caused by grounds that can be resolved by solving the fundamental problem with the relationship instead of focusing on winning the fight.


What about you? Please share your experiences on this matter, and your ideas on how this should be handled.